Put Your Anger under Control
Anger is a powerful emotion which is characteristic of every person no matter how mild he or she seems to be. If being suppressed, anger can destroy you from the inside, if revealed without measure and reason it can hurt people surrounding you. That’s why it is very important to control your anger in order not to cause troubles both yourself and other people.
Anger control will save you from some problems with your health. If you are in a hot temper too often and the feeling is too strong it may lead to high blood pressure, heart diseases and disorders of your nervous system. If the anger is suppressed it usually leads to anxiety, depression, headaches, skin disorders and digestive problems. The fact is, anger is neither good nor bad – it is just a normal emotion you should learn to work with.
First of all, you need to understand the reason of your anger. There can be other emotions hidden in its shade which lead you out of control. It may be shame, embarrassment, vulnerability standing behind your hot temper. Listen to yourself and react according to your true emotions.
If there is no time for finding the reasons and performing the session of self-cognition, you should try a simple but nevertheless effective method – try to count to 10. Do not forget to breathe deeply. You may even take a timeout and isolate yourself from the difficult situation temporarily and perform some physical activity, like running or doing exercises. When you feel that the first and the most dangerous wave of your anger has gone, express your feelings in a clear and polite manner. However, do not hurry and collect your thought before speaking. It will protect you from saying something you will regret in future. All in all, the first and principal advice of any anger managing program is to take your time and slow down. Freeze your emotions and release them again when you will be in a sound mind again.
Another aspect of controlling your anger includes some mental exercises and efforts. If you feel that you are ready to explode concentrate on the physical sensations the anger gives to your body – listen to your pounding heart, feel the knots in your stomach. By these means your body gives you the cue that it is time to calm down. Imagine yourself in some pleasant place, remember your favorite melody, try to abstract from the negative factor or person. Then, when you feel that you are ready, try to put yourself in your opponent’s place and understand the reasons of his behavior. Try also to find something funny in the situation and learn to laugh at yourself. Laughing is incompatible with any negative feeling, besides, it will help to decrease the tension.
Sometimes it is better not to use these techniques but avoid the source of anger completely. Explore your everyday life and define the triggers of your anger. If it is possible, avoid the people who make you feel aggressive, or situations which are stressful to you. There is no need to make your body and your mind perform extra effort when there is an opportunity to avoid it.